Ah, what better way to celebrate my little brother coming home from the war than to go out and rent a movie called Toolbox Murders, right? Actually, we played it safe and rented the original Dawn of the Dead as well in case the unknown movie sucked and had just gotten back from seeing G.I. Joe, so our minds were really ready for anything. Plus, as many of you know my little brother and I are like a team when it comes to horror movies and the fact that he has been stuck in Iraq for two years has really put a damper on the horror movie experience. So, movies in hand, the two of us went to my parent’s
Horror Movies - Toolbox Murders (2003)
basement, a place that brings back many horror movie memories, and started the DVD.
Now my little brother always states that the great thing about horror movies is that you really can’t lose because if the movie is good you sit there scared out of your mind and if it really sucks you sit there laughing your ass off. This movie didn’t really work like that though and sort of occupied the middle ground between good and bad, something that isn’t easy to accomplish with a horror movie. The problem was that it didn’t seem scary and any scene that attempted to be suspenseful kind of wrapped itself up before the heart could even begin its rapid climb. Also, despite the recognizable talent within the movie, the characters weren’t really ones that you cared about, so when their time came it wasn’t really a big deal and the
only thing one thinks about during the brutal death is whether or not the neighbors in the apartment building are finally going to realize that the screams in the middle of the night are real and not the rehearsals of aspiring actors (something which was probably amusing for those involved in the movie, but doesn’t really transfer well to those outside of the Hollywood community). The biggest disappointment with this movie, however, is the fact that Tobe Hooper was the director and given the wonderful work he did with the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, one would think he could have developed another classic, especially given the potential this storyline offered. Instead all he cared about, it seems, was making sure the scenes progressed in a quick orderly fashion as if trying to escape a burning building.
So, needless to say, this movie was a disappointment, but one which I can’t put into the Movies that Sucked category because it really wasn’t bad, just one that didn’t come together despite everything it had going for it.
Now my little brother always states that the great thing about horror movies is that you really can’t lose because if the movie is good you sit there scared out of your mind and if it really sucks you sit there laughing your ass off. This movie didn’t really work like that though and sort of occupied the middle ground between good and bad, something that isn’t easy to accomplish with a horror movie. The problem was that it didn’t seem scary and any scene that attempted to be suspenseful kind of wrapped itself up before the heart could even begin its rapid climb. Also, despite the recognizable talent within the movie, the characters weren’t really ones that you cared about, so when their time came it wasn’t really a big deal and the
only thing one thinks about during the brutal death is whether or not the neighbors in the apartment building are finally going to realize that the screams in the middle of the night are real and not the rehearsals of aspiring actors (something which was probably amusing for those involved in the movie, but doesn’t really transfer well to those outside of the Hollywood community). The biggest disappointment with this movie, however, is the fact that Tobe Hooper was the director and given the wonderful work he did with the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, one would think he could have developed another classic, especially given the potential this storyline offered. Instead all he cared about, it seems, was making sure the scenes progressed in a quick orderly fashion as if trying to escape a burning building.
So, needless to say, this movie was a disappointment, but one which I can’t put into the Movies that Sucked category because it really wasn’t bad, just one that didn’t come together despite everything it had going for it.
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